HELL-o and welcome kittens! Join me, Captain Cruella of the Carnivorous Cadavers, on my quest for the perfect libation to pair with what every zomBabe desires...BRAINS!

24th June 2011

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Roses are red, violets are in my cocktail. The original Aviation.

The Aviation has been around at least since 1911 and is a deliciously obscure cocktail that has the combination of bad luck and an uncommon-ingredients recipe. Combining two parts gin, one part lemon juice, and two dashes each of maraschino and Crème de Violette liqueur which gives this drink it’s very interesting periwinkle coloring. Crème de Violette is an essential ingredient but may be very hard to find. It is a deep lavender coloured liqueur that uses Violet flowers to obtain its very unique flavoring.

Here’s how we do it up in the Crypt:

  • 2 shots gin ( I prefer Tanqueray)
  • ½ shot lemon juice
  • ⅓ shot Maraschino Liqueur
  • ⅙ shot Crème de Violette Liqueur
  • Shake well with ice and fine strain in to a cocktail glass. Garnish with a Maraschino cherry.

I highly suggest this drink be made WITH the violette liqueur as I’ve had it without and it is an entirely different drink. Serve with your favorite human, I mean FOR your favorite human and enjoy a cocktail that takes you back to a time where class meant more than a social standing. Viva la liquor and bottoms up, kittens!

Tagged: Aviation cocktailcocktailscruellasconcoctionscruellascryptCreme de Violetteclassic cocktails

8th June 2011

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The Bastardized Box Car

The Box Car is one of those classic cocktails that’s been around since the days of prohibition.There are some ghoulisciously great cocktails emerging from these times and one of my all time favorites is the Box Car. Gin, triple sec, lemon juice and grenadine are all original ingredients BUT the original recipe called for egg whites. However, with such fear of salmonella poisoning humans are always cautious about adding this extra ingredient. (I’ll go out on a severed limb here, and just tell you that by using pasteurized egg whites this pretty much solves this little issue…so DON’T SKIP IT!)

I for one consider the use of the egg white is an essential ingredient - it adds to the overall frothiness of this cocktail. You can always adjust the sweet or sour balance to your own tastes but in all seriousness kittens, don’t leave out the egg white! Enjoy this classic cocktail like we do up in Cruella’s Crypt and party like it’s 1933!


Here’s how we do it up in the Crypt:

Box Car

1/12 oz Tanqueray

1 oz Triple Sec

1 Tsp Lemon Juice

½ Tsp Grenadine Syrup

1 egg white (highly recommended so just do it!)

In a shaker half-filled with ice cubes, combine all of the ingredients. Shake well. Strain into a sours glass or a martini glass ( if you’re fancy) and serve promptly to all your ghoul friends! As always Viva la Liquor and bottoms up, Kittens!

Tagged: bootleggersclassic cocktailscruellasconcoctionscruellascryptprohibitionBox Car Cocktail

2nd June 2011

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One Big Lebowski and raise you a White Russian

 “The Big Lebowski” has attracted a cult following, and as the film’s renown has grown, so has the renown of the White Russian, or, as the Dude calls them, “Caucasians.”  Not long ago, the cocktail was considered passé and often likened, in its original formula, to an alcoholic milkshake and I couldn’t agree more. However, on a nice relaxing Saturday afternoon there’s nothing better than pouring yourself one of these, sitting down with a good book and chillaxing for the afternoon.

I know most of you might be surprised by what I’m about to tell you, and as a bartender myself I often come across this cocktail murder as most people have no idea how to make a White Russian. Repeat after me, VODKA, Kahlua, Cream. Yes…3 part drink. 3. Here’s how we do it up in the crypt:

2 oz Vodka ( I prefer Grey Goose or Three Olives) but anything will do

1 oz Kahlua

4 parts cream

In a rocks glass filled with ice pour the Vodka, Kahlua and cream. Shake and serve up to all your “dudes”

My suggestion to you is to go netflix the Big Lebowski, sit back with your White Russians and count how many times the dude actually bowls. ( and I’m sure after about 3 or 4 of these babies you’ll be skipping back and forth through this movie to see that he never actually does get to bowl..not even once!) Enjoy and Viva la Lebowski, Kittens!

Tagged: big lebowskiwhite russiancaptain cruella

26th May 2011

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I want MEAT in MY cocktail, you?

I have a crazy fascination with bacon. Actually come to think of it I have a fascination with smoked and cured meats in general, thus adding to my ever growing list of drink recipes this one including—you guessed it, bacon infused vodka. Why you ask? Why not? Make yourself a Bloody Mary. Now go make yourself a Bloody Mary with Bakon Vodka. It just got infinitely better, trust me. Now I’m not one for mixing chocolate and anything meat flavored, real or not, but I’m thinking that we just might be serving up a little choco-Bakon Vodka cocktail in the near future. ( I’ll let you know how that goes on a later post.)

Getting back to the original drink mentioned, the Bloody Mary has many stories about how it was first concocted. One is that famous Hollywood comedic actor George Jessel invented the drink around 1939, which was first mentioned in print in a gossip column “This New York” which is the earliest known mention of the drink by that name in the United States.

We here in the Crypt enjoy this hearty drink and recommend serving it on a lazy Sunday mid-morning or during an early Saturday brunch after a long night of human hunting.

Here’s how we do it up in the Crypt-

1½ oz. Bakon Vodka
• Tomato juice or V8
• 1 dash each of celery salt and ground black pepper
• 2-4 dashes each of Worcestershire sauce and Tabasco
• 1/8 tsp. horseradish

Shake and pour into a salt rimmed pint glass. Garnish with a celery stalk, a row of speared olives and a slice of bacon. I also highly recommend a fresh human and several spoons to scoop the brains with, what can I say—we’re classy up in this here joint. As always Viva la Liquor and Bottoms up, Kittens!

Tagged: bloody maryBakon VodkaBacon infused liquorZombie cocktails

20th May 2011

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Toasting the end of the world with Dark and Stormies!

As you may or may not have heard, tomorrow is claiming to be our last days on earth. I for one am kind of giddy with excitement, as there’s nothing better than a bunch of easily obtained cadavers just laying about for the taking. So—as I sit and wait for the world to burn, explode, implode, be swallowed by a huge wave of water, be destroyed by radioactive stay puff marshmallow men or my horde of hungry zombies, I raise my glass and toast ya’ll with one hell of an easy to make and delicious to drink end-of-time cocktails. Dark and Stormy anyone?

This classic highball is a brand-specific mixed drink that is completely—and some would say wrong tasting— if anything other than Gosling’s Black Seal rum and Gosling’s ginger beer were to be used. Some bartenders will add lime juice to the drink, but the addition of this is totally unnecessary and my preference is to leave it out all together. The Dark and Stormy gained popularity through sailing folks up and down the East coast of the US, having been brought home by various sailors who frequented places such as Bermuda and other tropical islands.

So while you’re running around grabbing gallons of water, a thousand canned goods and other provisions here’s the list of ingredients you’ll be needing to celebrate your demise along with me:

Dark and Stormy:

2 oz Gosling’s Black Seal rum

8 oz Gosling’s ginger beer

lime slice for garnish

Highball glass

ice

Here’s how we do it up in the Crypt-

In a highball glass filled with ice pour in the 2 oz of rum, then top with the ginger beer. Garnish with a lime slice and enjoy while the world burns! So while we’re drinking it’s an opportune time to let you know that you’ve been duped. This is a ploy on my part to get you totally drunk. It’s easier to pluck you delicious humans off while you’re intoxicated after all! As always Bottoms Up and Viva la Faux Rapture!



Tagged: dark and stormygoslings rum and ginger beerend of the world

10th May 2011

Question

tumblrbot asked: WHAT IS YOUR EARLIEST HUMAN MEMORY?

HA ha ha ha haaaa… Oh Tumblrbot. You do ask the silliest questions.

10th May 2011

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Green Aliens, Lance Henriksen and The Vault of Horror

In lieu of Lance Henriksens biography Not Bad for a Human, the blogathon, which ended Sunday and The Vault of Horror’s interview with Mr. Henriksen I have decided to share here in CruellasConcoctions the Green Alien cocktail with all you Crypt Creepers! Of course this a dedication to one of his most notable roles as the android Bishop in the Aliens movies. So sit back, pop in one of your favorite Lance movies and imbibe in a little green alcoholic goodness!

 

Ingredients for a Green Alien

3 oz Midori Melon Liqueur

1 oz Lemon Juice

1 oz Rose’s Lime juice

Top with equal parts of Sprite and Seltzer

Here’s how we do it up in the Crypt:

In a shaker filled with ice pour the Midori, lemon juice and Rose’s lime juice. Shake and pour in a highball glass filled with ice. Fill with equal parts Sprite and seltzer, garnish with a lime wedge and serve to your ghouls! And as always Viva la Liquor and Bottoms up, Kittens!

 

 

Tagged: Lance HenriksenGreen AlienMidori cocktailsAliens movieVault of Horror

5th May 2011

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The D-lux, The D-lish, The Cadillac Margarita!

Hola, Kittens! In celebration of Cinco de Mayo, we in the Crypt wanted to share with all of YOU our favorite way to partake in enjoying the wonderfully smokey flavor of Tequila! Over the years I’ve had some pretty heinous and bastardized versions of what a margarita should be, I’m here to save your taste buds from that horrible fate. Today I bring you, The Cadillac Margarita. We label this as “Cadillac” because there is no skimping on the ingredients. If you are to pull of the proper Cadillac Margarita you will need to go to the top shelf for your Tequila and will want to consider a reposado instead of a blanco. You will also need to skip the white orange liqueurs like Triple Sec and even Cointreau and go with the cognac-based Grand Marnier. The next tip is you absolutely must have freshly squeezed lime juice! With this formula I can garauntee you will have the ultimate margarita drinking experience. It’s what this is all about, yes?

Cadillac Margarita:

1 ½ oz. Premium Tequila

1 oz. Grand Marnier

¾ oz. Freshly squeezed limejuice

Margaritas can be served in a variety of glasses, most notably the stereotypical margarita glass, a variant of the classic Champagne coupe; this is particularly associated with blended fruit margaritas.In formal settings margaritas are often served in a standard cocktail glass, while in informal settings, particularly when serves with ice, margaritas can be served in an old-fashioned glass. This all depends on how fancy you’d like to get and how much you’d like to impress the boils and ghouls that you’re entertaining.

  

Here’s how we do it up in the Crypt:

Pour the ingredients into your cocktail shaker that’s been filled with ice. Shake well and strain into a chilled margarita or an old-fashioned glass that the rim had been dipped in limejuice, then margarita salt if you prefer. Garnish with a lime wedge. Serve!

 

 

 

As a little side note there are many stories about the history of this delightful and potent concoction was created. Here is one of my personal favorites involving the beautiful Ms. Rita Hayworth.

 

It was in the early 1940s when an inspired bartender, Enrique Bastate Gutierrez who lived in Tijuana, Mexico, boasted to have created the Margarita as a homage to actress Rita Hayworth, whose real name was Margarita Cansino.Other versions of the story claim the Margarita was indeed named after the actress, but in the 1930s, before she adopted her screen name. As a teenager, Margarita Cansino—Rita Hayworth,  worked as a dancer at the Foreign Club, in Tijuana, where there she supposedly inspired a bartender.

 

Enjoy this Cinco de Mayo, your Cadillac Margaritas and as always Bottoms Up and Viva la Liquor, Kittens!

Tagged: Margaritastequilacadillac margaritasdrink recipescocktailscruellascryptcruellasconcoctions

4th May 2011

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Red Death-The Cocktail

As the summer approaches us steadily, we here in the Crypt anxiously await the sweet scent of roasting flesh wafting through the air and what better to pair charred flesh with than one of these delightful concoctions known as Red Death! Despite it’s name, the Red Death cocktail is an exceptionally light and refreshing blend. 

Red Death Cocktail: For this cocktail you will be using a highball glass and will require a shaker.

 

1/2 oz. Vodka

1/2 oz. Triple Sec.

1/2 oz. Amaretto.

1/2 oz. Sloe Gin.

1/2 oz. Southern Comfort.

1 oz. of Rose’s Lime Juice.

Orange juice

 

 

Here’s how we do it up in the Crypt:

Fill shaker about half way with ice cubes, add the liquor and lime juice. Fill the rest of the way with orange juice. Shake well and serve! I have been known on occasion in those scorching summer nights to blend this concoction and serve in a tall glass with a straw.

 

I’ll leave you with a little Poe for inspiration:

There were arabesque figures with unsuited limbs and appointments. There were delirious fancies such as the madman fashions. There was much of the beautiful, much of the wanton, much of the bizarre, something of the terrible, and not a little of that which might have excited disgust. To and fro in the seven chambers there stalked, in fact, a multitude of dreams. And these —the dreams —writhed in and about, taking hue from the rooms, and causing the wild music of the orchestra to seem as the echo of their steps. Edgar Allen Poe- The Masque of the Red Death

I’m thinking they went mad from drinking one too many of these little devils. While they go down smooth, these pack a real 1-2-3 punch! Bottoms Up and Viva la Liquor, Kittens!

Tagged: red death cocktailsmasque of the red death

4th May 2011

Question

tumblrbot asked: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE INANIMATE OBJECT?

Tsk, tsk—cocktail glasses, silly tumblr.